Twallk 1 - Crossing the Desert

[Intro to "twallk":  I am starting a new kind of thread whose posts will be much shorter, and ongoing.  The title combines the idea of "Tweeting" (trying to keep the posts to two or three paragraphs) and "talking" with "walking" and "wall."  The idea for these posts arises from the recent and more permanent death of my laptop, which holds in its sacred HDD all (about eight) of my next posts here...not to mention all the spreadsheets (about 30) for a business I have been developing.  Just another bump on this cobblestone road of mine.  So, with all that in mind, here we go...]

* * * * * * *Twallk In* * * * *

The cloud cover was merciful this morning.  Yesterday beat the record for all observed high temperatures in Maine for the month of July.  It was 100 F (TD Bank in Portland displayed 108 F).  The sanctuary of the South Portland Public Library and its partially-functioning AC is of course very welcome.  Having a very hard time sapping the heat inside my mind though.  This one-step-forward-two-steps-back life is wearing me to the very threads.  Even my cloths aren't disintegrating as quickly as my satisfaction-level, and that's saying something since I sew-up a new hole in my shorts nearly every day.  As spiritually motivated as I can seem sometimes, it really is the lack of material security (and thus the power to overcome my circumstances) that lays me lower than anything else. 


In desperation for financial relief, I have been tempted to ask again for crumbs from my parents--who have given me ABSOLUTELY NOTHING for over 9 months now (not even moral support). Though they read this blog and know how much you all have appreciated it or found it entertaining (and have yourselves given generously), it is not worth their energy, nor does it apparently even enter their minds that THEY TOO could at least support the blog, despite their ignorant misconception of the philosophy behind my Odyssey. But I will resist begging for crumbs. I'd rather be starving and hold on to my melting dignity than lower myself to erroneously allowing them to think that their tightness is justified.

On a slightly happier note...Now that the sun is coming out I will remain here in the library most of the day.  I have begun The Beatles: The Biography, by Bob Spitz; a MASSIVE work (880 pages of text).  I'm a rather slow reader--only about 100 pages a day on average.  So this is going to take the better part of a week and a half to finish.  But it is extraordinarily well-written.  I simply can't put it down.  Most of you know how obsessed I am with the story, music and lives of the fab four.  So, finding this book is like manna from heaven. 

* * * * * * *Twallk Out* * * * * * *