A Living Magazine - Tap Root: Days 109 to 112 - And Lo, When Cold is Descending...Comes a Tale

I'm writing this from 20 degree tent, as the wind pummels my tarp, tearing corners lose. Every now and then I have to venture out into the 5 degree tempest to tack the tarps back onto their supports. But something about all of this is keeping my spirits up, as well as keeping me alive.

You have not been awake until you absolutely must survive without heat in subfreezing temperatures. And, you have never slept as well as you do by crawling from that situation into a warm sleeping bag. I am finding this experience is just what I need to feel like I am still alive. I don't mean that in a melodramatic way--more as a simple and pragmatic thing.

Twice I was almost taken out of this world. My life, as I demand the conceit, is beginning to resemble  a symphony; something that backs up an opera. But if it is to include an opera, perhaps the storyline in this last movement still depends upon the two preceding Acts? You who have stuck with me for all of this time are the co-actors, so it is okay fit yourselves into the process. It is likely that you will not even remember reading this post.

Nevertheless, I plan to deliver a few posts throughout this coming winter which should entertain you very much, while I use them to compile my first book. I may edit them after publishing as I edit the book, but it should be interesting. I now have a way to be online at my property (such as it is). And don't I have the ultimate ghost story (maybe the wrong term?) to share!

You might as well come with me back through the portal between the worlds. This is as real as I can make it. Why do I long so dearly to wear my soul on the outside? How can I show it to you? These are the last chapters and I have come full circle. I know exactly why I'm here after all the travel across the country. Yes, it is to finally live my dream of developing something from nothing. But, because of the rare way that things have worked out, it is also to untie the most complicated knot that has ever been devised...at least in my life. It has fastened itself to a shackle that I unwittingly tied around my own ankle. And so, Iwallk with the weight of all of the self that I have lost in that extra labor, dragging it behind me like a dead costume--like a dead identity. But I am not dead.

I know this sounds irritatingly enigmatic. Sorry about that. The temperature is dropping figuratively and physically and I need to get into bed. I just wanted to catch up a bit so that I can begin the process of telling my tale.

I will also do regular property update posts as always. 

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Just because I am excited to freeze my ass of in some delusional quest of deliverance, does not mean that donations and contributions aren't joyfully accepted. If you like following this crazy shit, please click the PayPal donate button to send a few bucks my way. At this point I am looking for a few extra bucks to cover buying a heater. Ha! 

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