A Living Magazine - Day 231 - Homecoming - Charlotte: The IWALLK Lexicon

I woke with the watch alarm at 6:00 a.m. But I did that thing where I said to myself, "Self, we could sleep one more hour and still get away with it, couldn't we?" 

"Sure!" I replied, then accidentally slept until 7:30. That was a risky move--unintended as it might have been. The sun was already peeking through the trees behind me. And the orange of the tent might disappear at night, but it tends to stick out during the day. The cars going north on the road beside me couldn't see it, but the southbound traffic could if they were interested.

When I'm self conscious about being seen it seems like the whole world is looking for me. I constantly remind myself that they really aren't. No one gives a shit. I suppose if the police were to catch a glimpse of a guy up in the woods, they would pull over and investigate. But golly, I really think they must have better things to do with their time, since that has never happened.

Anyhow, I dragged the tent back into the woods a little farther to disassemble it. When everything was packed and Saggy was on my back, I did a few steps toward the road, then stopped for a car to pass, then rinsed and repeated until I was right at the edge of the tree line. When it was clear both ways, I only had to take two steps to be walking down the shoulder as if I'd been walking all morning. I know I obsess about not being seen, but I feel like if I were to just take it for granted I'd be dropping my guard.

I made the short walk to Starbucks...

Signs of a town rich in music and art.

I worked to get a post up, but kept being distracted by various other things until I finally published at around 4:30 p.m. Not much else happened on this day, except for the Super Bowl; the Carolina Panthers faced the Denver Broncos. You can guess who this town was betting on. Later this night I would hear the effects of the game through the woods.

I have been waiting a long time to make a list of terms and sayings that I use here at the blog to which I can refer. I'll make it a permanent page at some point and add to it as necessary. Some of the following refer more to the Manifest Destiny crossing (the Journey before A Living Magazine), but they are going to resurface in a new way and should be defined.

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THE IWALLK LEXICON

Being Begged - Having someone for something from me.

Crossing - The trip from one US coast to another. By the time I'm done I will have made three: (1) New England Atlantic Coast to the Southern Pacific Coast, (2) The Northern Pacific Coast to the Gulf Coast, and (3) The Gulf Coast to the New England Atlantic Coast.

Die by service - My intention to keep serving even if the results of that service are what eventually kill me. It is specific to the service of my friends. (Please also see "Live by service" and "Service" below.)

Hiking Tarp - This is the small blue tarp that I use during heavy downpours to keep the tarp/fly from leaking. I found it at an abandoned campsite in Athens, Georgia.

Host - Someone who invites me to stay with him/her for one or more nights.

Journey - Some have called this term "trite." I needed a term for these traveling projects and had to name each separate part of my travels something, so I chose the word "Journey" for each. There have been four Journeys: (1) Odyssey, (2) A Manifest Destiny, (3) A Living Magazine, and (4) A Living Magazine - Homecoming.

Light Blindness - The phenomenon of light reflecting off objects at night, obscuring what may lay behind them. Whenever someone is in a bright area, dark areas are that much harder to see.  I rely on this effect for finding suitable sleep spots.

Live by service - My personal expectation for myself, for the rest of my life. It is specific to the service of friends. (Please also see "Service" below.)

Lucid Awareness - Sometimes this is called "Lucid Dreaming." But I believe that when I reach this state of consciousness while my body is asleep I am no longer dreaming, because my mind is fully awake. This process has evolved for me. I have come to realize that it is the Spark that initiates this state and now I use my time there to learn from the Spark.

The New Advent - What I did and what I experienced led to what I wrote about as the "New Advent" in the Manifest Destiny crossing. To me, it was/is for everyone—inside and out. I'd already suspected something similar myself for quite a long time before the first crossing. My discussion and statements about it weren't for my own benefit. I felt obligated to share these thoughts whenever times seemed appropriate for such sharing. Those readers who are inclined toward humanism, existentialism, agnosticism and atheism – and who don't interpret the things described above (e.g. the Spark, the unseen companion, the unseen observers or the Universe consciousness) as I do – may find that treating these subjects as fiction could still be entertaining. 

No one knows what's better for you than you do - Pretty self-explanatory.

Own where you are - Make where you are your own, even if it is only for one night or one moment/

Prickers - Pricker bushes, like raspberries.

Primary Location - A location where I meet, and stay with a host for more than one night.

The Protector - A human friend - former military - who advised me and made sure I was well supplied to survive outside.

Safety Profile - The physical aspects of a sleep spot that make it less likely for humans or potentially dangerous animals to discover it.

Saggy - My LLBean backpack; named for the way it droops in back.

Secondary Location - A location without a host where I stay for more than one night.

Service - My particular definition of this word is expressed through this statement: "There is no greater love than to lay down one's life for one's friends." It was originally related to "death by service," but I decided to make it positive, and now relate it to "live by service."

Sleep Spot - This is where I rough camp. In earlier posts this was sometimes called a "sleeping place" or a "nest." It may variously be interchangeable with the term "camp site." 

Snaggy - My sleeping bag, named after the deteriorating zipper.

The Spark - This is a term I have used to name the piece of conscious infinity that I had felt for many years before the first crossing; something I believe is in my mind and every other human mind on this planet. Only after several weeks into the Manifest Destiny Journey did the concept solidify into a personal contactable reality for me. It is the internal Center of my intuition and the sixth-sense doorway to all transcendental realities, as I understand them.

Into it I send my volitional thoughts, and out from it comes its Will for me, along with its Power to influence the material world around me through its unified and unbroken contact with the Sparks of all other people and the minds of all other creatures. It is an entity that lacks a personality and seeks to become one with my personality. Together, the human and the Spark create a soul than can survive material death. Whether in this life or the next, they will fuse into one being, allowing the knowledge and experience of the Spark to combine with the personality of the human. Such a being becomes permanently immortal. 

Tarp/fly - This is the orange tarp that stretches over the tent. It is sometimes called a "rain fly" 

Tertiary Location - A location without a host where I only spend one night.

Think for yourself - A saying I've adopted from Timothy Leary. Self explanatory perhaps, yet I especially apply it to the rejection of all ideology (being the belief systems of other people), and use it to encourage the building of each of our own world views.

Under-tarp - This is the green tarp that I use as a "footprint" to lay over the ground and under the tent. It can also be used as an emergency tarp over the tent in heavy rain.

The Unseen Companion – The invisible presence of a being who spent large amounts of time with me on the first crossing. I felt him immediately after my decision not to give up and return to Maine and instead, headed out into the unknown from Boston's North Station on Day 2 of the Manifest Destiny Journey. It was as I began to walk toward South Boston that there suddenly "appeared" a being just outside my peripheral vision, while I felt his presence on the inside, as moderated by the Spark. He stayed with me through all of my time and struggles in New England and Pennsylvania until I arrived in St. Louis, Missouri, where I met RhonnaLeigh to stay with her for nearly two weeks.

Before that, while he was with me, he seemed to walk out ahead of me as I looked for sleeping places at night. He walked beside me, with a figurative "hand" on my shoulder, during the extremely long stretches (I did two 34 mile days of walking, for example), and during the stormy walks. He sat all night near me as I slept. He did not really function in any kind of material way, he was not there to protect me nor did he ever directly communicate with me.He was only there to be with me. And I did not feel alone at all during those times.

He rejoined me for my travels south through Missouri, then on through Arkansas. I believe he departed after my first nights in Conway, Arkansas. He then rejoined me as I headed out of Flagstaff, Arizona and stayed until I arrived in Fullerton, CA. I believe he has not been back since. I don't think he was a guardian angel or seraphim. In hindsight, I can see that he and the Spark helped train me for the Living Magazine Journeys, so that I could do it on my own, with only the Spark in my mind to guide me.

The Unseen Observers – On the hill where I camped in Tucson's Mountain Park, I "perceived" (in my mind) the Spark's presentation of hundreds of curious invisible beings who had come to that spot to simply observe this strange human--me.

Many were like the unseen companion and there were others too. I did not see them in the outside world, but rather overlaid upon it from my inner intuition, through the presentations of the Spark. I felt their sympathy as I asked to see a sign in the outside world—something they could not give me, or were not allowed to give me. To some extent I believe they have kept checking in on me ever since  that night, in the same way my human readers might be interested in knowing what I'm up to.

The Universe - A term I use for the Personality of the cosmos and the groups of collective consciousness that lie behind the inner portal of the Spark. I've felt that I am a human reporter, showing them our material world through the lenses of my eyes. I also felt that, although they can see our world from their more objective perspective, in order to perfectly fit their assistance to us into our world - perhaps through the New Advent to come - they need our subjective perspectives. I clearly realized that I was to be one of their foreign correspondents and cameramen on location.

In exchange for my open-eyed reporting--through the filter of my mind, they flashed certain aspects of their future plans to assist this world. I came to recognize that they are planning an official and semi-material contact with us in the near future. I came up with my own name for this: the aforementioned, New Advent.

I do not expect people to buy into my spiritual interpretation of what is happening to me. I am painfully aware of just how many other people in history have announced great paranormal events (second comings, apocalypses, alien arrivals from other planets, "Shifts" and Mayan prophecies, for example) only to disappoint those who believed.

I certainly don't see myself as a "prophet" and would be very disappointed to be either portrayed or thought of as one. But, in a sense, I do see myself as an unofficial messenger for the Universe about this future event and a reporter of current human life back through the Spark to the Universe. It is up to you readers to take that any way you want. If you just call me "crazy" you will be in good company.

If this messenger service is just a figment of my imagination, please understand that it is not being expressed as the result of "delusions of grandeur." There is no evidence to me that I am "special" or "chosen," nor that any other people aren't also saying the same things I am. It is simply important for me to tell what I'm personally going through in my own spiritual growth, and these are the ways I've chosen.

Wear your soul on the outside - A saying I've adopted from Terence McKenna to encourage being Real, practicing what we preach and opening up our lives to others. I have as my goal to eventually be seen for what was inside of me, by bringing it out through this blog. Someday I believe that all people will be spiritually beheld, instead of just materially seen. I think by the time I depart this world, my soul will be beheld in some similar way as I have described above.

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From the second floor of the Harris Teeter dining area I could see the skyline of Charlotte...

This eastern area of Charlotte is somewhat elevated and allows a nice skyline shot. 

I was very fortunate to have chosen a part of town with the two places I would need during my stay here; the post office (to send out some Gaston Gazettes to friends) and a great library branch...

This library branch would be open the next day, Monday.

It was time to find some cheap eats and then head back to the sleep spot...

A look back at the place where I'd done work for the last two days.

Charlotte has a nice night skyline too. My camera does not work very well capturing night images, but the following came out fairly well. I will try to get downtown for some night shots later this week. Interesting to note is that I can also see the blue-lit tops of these buildings from my sleep spot...

I got back to the sleep spot a little earlier than the night before to try for a longer sleep. I didn't want to wake up as late as I had been...

Set up for shelter on a colder night.

While I was outside just taking in the last of the night air, I heard what sounded like a really nasty fight between two small critters. It was similar to a cat fight, but the sounds were more vicious. In other words, cats will do a lot of posturing, threatening and really scary noises before they resort to physical violence. These little guys tonight just went straight at each other. Some time passed, and as I faced the road, I heard the sound of little footsteps walking on my left. Then there were some on my right. And, while I listened to these, there were some behind me too. 

I got that shiver from the Spark that told me other creatures were around. After I quelled the automatic paranoia of thinking it was coyotes (always my first concern), I reasoned that it was just the small creatures I'd heard fighting, now going of to lick their wounds perhaps. 

There is always a kind of conservation of nature's energy. What is deleterious in one circumstance may be advantageous in another. The dry leaves that were so loud to me as I walking into this spot, were also apt alarms for hearing other animals around me. Nothing large could sneak up unless it was very patient and stepped very slowly and randomly. These are things that "normal" people just don't get to learn.

Not only were there hints of nature's creatures nearby, but the Super Bowl cheers coming from the neighborhood behinds me, and down the street at both ends, combined with the occasional fireworks explosion told me (apparently) that Carolina must be winning. I specifically remember large cheering at 8:06, 8:26 and 8:46 p.m. Perhaps that's when Carolina was trying to get through that Bronco defense. I have no idea. But, by the time the game was over, there were fireworks all around. I was shocked to learn the next day that the Broncos had actually won! 

What a unique situation I find myself in. I can see and hear the human world around me any time I want, but then figuratively turn to see and hear the natural world too. I truly am immersed in both, equally. I get a tiny prick of anxiety when I think that this will all be over in about five months.

There are over three hundred million people in the United States. I wonder just how many of them have jobs as a source of income and use urban camping as a way to sleep at night? Am I the only one? I'd be interested to know of anyone else who does exactly what I do. Please let me know! I slept well again on this night. 

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